3D Sidewalk Chalk Is a Thing and It Is the Cat’s Pajamas

Thank you Crayola for giving me what’s been missing from my life.  I already loved sidewalk chalk and then you went and made it 3D and it’s even more love worthy.  I hate 3D movies but I now adore 3D sidewalk chalk.  Even the included orange plastic 3D glasses are miles cooler than those flimsy cardboard numbers at the movie theater.  The neon colors?  Another excellent touch.  Thank you thank you thank you.

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Due to no limitation of the 3D chalk but rather my camera (humor me in blaming the hardware instead of my lack of photography skills) I can’t show you why the 3D chalk is so so awesome.  Just trust me when I say it’s worth every penny of the $11.97 price tag.  To apologize for failing to capture the 3D chalk’s awesomeness I’ll show you my super lame and embarrassing drawings in 2D.

First there are the stacked squares.  Like I said, super lame without the 3D effect.  However put those orange glasses on and it’s like a whole new world.  FYI overlapping spirals look pretty awesome too.

Next up, the not so embarrassing chalk flower.  Peanut (my oldest munchkin) added that beautiful touch of blue.  Again, way more awesome in 3D.

Lastly we have the pièce de résistance.  The drawing that will get me rejected from a drawing job before I even apply.  The picture cavemen would be ashamed of.  The best version of an apology I can give you for failing to photograph the 3D awesomeness of this chalk.

Meet Tyrion the horse.  (Could you even tell it was a horse?)  I’m not talking Peter Dinklage’s symmetrical and therefore objectively handsome Tyrion.  I’m talking George R. R. Martin’s different length legs and missing nose Tyrion.  Peanut was thrilled with this drawing but something about the face creeps me out.  All I can say is thank God I didn’t attempt to draw the bottom of his fourth leg because we all know what that would have looked like.  As for the giant blue line coming straight out of his back, your guess is as good as mine.

When my best attempt at a horse looks like this I think we can all understand why I couldn’t capture the 3D photograph.  Forgive me?  It’s ok if you don’t.  Your scorn can’t touch how inadequate these overachievers make me feel.

(Are they each drawing in a parking lot space?  I think I’m getting a brilliant idea for a school art program fundraiser involving parking space decoration…)

Just imagine what these talented people could do with some Crayola Neon 3D Washable Sidewalk Chalk!  The results would no doubt be mind blowing.  Maybe Crayola should consider making a non-washable version but for now Tyrion and I are eagerly awaiting the next rain storm.

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